i love how no matter how badly you fuck up benadryl cumquat’s name everyone on here still knows who ur talking about
friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?
me: i don’t have money
friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay
Do you ever feel people staring at you and you like forget how to walk
If you think your mom overreacts just remember once my mom cancelled our trip to New York because I refused to eat the meatloaf she made
my mom accused me of selling my birth certificate and social security to the black market when she couldn’t find them